We’re Hiring! (We’re Not. But Thanks for Uploading Your Soul Anyway.)

I just read an article by Madeleine Ngo for The New York Times about how employers pulled back on hiring and added just 73,000 jobs last month — and suddenly everything made sense. Like why the job I interviewed for in March still says “under review.” Like why I keep rewriting my cover letter even though no one reads them. Like why I’ve started identifying more as a full-time “Hope Strategist” than an applicant.

The article painted a sobering picture: job gains have slowed, previous months were overestimated (by a casual 258,000 — just a small village of imaginary jobs), and businesses are putting their hiring plans on hold like they’re deciding whether or not to adopt a second cat. They want to grow, they really do… but have you seen the economy? It’s giving “maybe later.”

The unemployment rate ticked up slightly to 4.2%. Economists say it’s not catastrophic, just “materially weaker.” Which sounds like a polite way of saying, “It’s not falling off a cliff… but it did trip over a coffee table and now it’s icing its ankle with frozen peas and a prayer.”

And if you thought federal jobs might be a backup? Well, the government lost 12,000 jobs last month. That’s right, even they’re cutting back, which means you’re now competing with former federal employees for the same marketing coordinator role that pays in vibes and granola bars.

Manufacturing? Down again. For the third straight month. Apparently, tariffs were supposed to help but have backfired spectacularly. Who would’ve thought that charging more for the parts we need to build things would hurt the people trying to build things? (Spoiler: economists. Literally all of them.)

Wages are technically up — 0.3% for the month, 3.9% over the year — but let’s be honest. That’s just enough to afford half a sandwich and a side of existential dread.

And yet, through it all, the job listings remain. Glimmering like false promises. They say things like “We’re looking for a rockstar!” or “Must be hungry!” but what they really mean is, “We’re legally required to post this before we hire the CEO’s cousin.” Or worse, “We’re not hiring, but we crave attention.”

One economist quoted in the article said:

“It’s hard to pull the trigger on hiring when you’re uncertain about where tariffs are going to land.”

Ma’am. It’s hard to pull the trigger on brushing my teeth before noon when I’ve been rejected by a company that ghosted me after inviting me to a third-round panel interview titled “Vibes Fit.” (I failed. Apparently, my vibes were too recession-adjacent.)

So what do we do? We keep going. We apply. We refresh. We tell ourselves that maybe the next click will lead to a callback, even if the last three only led to a “Thanks but no thanks” email that opened with, “We were impressed with your background…”

Were you? Were you really?

Because if you were, I wouldn’t still be bonding with my dog over mutual unemployment.

But hey, at least now we know the truth. It’s not just you. It’s not just your resume. It’s not your font choice, or that comma in your bullet point, or the fact that you blinked weird during the Zoom interview.

It’s the market.

It’s the economy.

It’s the chaos of a hiring landscape run by uncertainty, inflation, and the occasional Bitmoji from HR.

So pour yourself a strong coffee. Put on your best elastic pants. And keep showing up.

Because even when the job market gives you 73,000 maybe’s and 258,000 “never minds,” you’re still here. Still trying.

And that, my friend, is a full-time job in itself.

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